Sweet Jesus

I'LL bet that life-size chocolate statue of Jesus tastes ......... heavenly!

Ralph Fiennes hostie loses all her money.

WHEN you're having it off in the loo
With Ralph Fiennes, who'd just gone for a poo,
After playing the bunny,
Better bank all your money.
Which bank? Well...I'll leave that to you.

Senator Santo Santoro's shame.

SENATOR Santo Santoro failed to disclose 72 share holdings. That's a gross neglect of duty! Well...half a gross.

Bloody referee!

REFEREES are so very inclined
To be cursed and severely maligned.
IT's not that they're daft
Or lacking in craft...
It's just that they're fucking-well BLIND!

Let there be fluorescent light

AND it was said, "Let there be fluorescent light", and there was light, and Malcolm Turnbull was standing in it - yea, the limelight.

Ode to Shane Warne

IT'S true that you could have been thinner,
But a winner, we know, is a grinner.
You are simply the best,
You must have been blest,
Well done, and now please...come in spinner.

Ruddy mistake?

RUDD looked like a really big winner
Until he attended a dinner
With Burke and his mates
And their troublesome traits.
Sure, now he looks much like a sinner.